Moving

First of all I have moved 12 and now 13 times in 39 years. That is once every 3 years. Keep in mind that I did live in the same place for 11 of those years. Also 3 of the moves were just different dorm rooms/apartments during college. Also the last 4 have been with my husband. The others were because my father was in the military.

It is like a career with us. My sister has moved 18 times in 46 years and as we speak is inbetween homes, not really homeless but almost.

SO how do we do it? First reduce. Throw away anything that you have been hoarding: egg cartons, juice jugs, varios containers. Take library books back and return anything you have borrowed. Then go through clothes and get rid of faded, stained and holey anything. Even if you had it as a back up. It is now time to officailly let it go. Only keep enough rags to clean up the new home or the old one you are leaveing. A good goal for us is 1/3 of our household. Nothing misses inspection.

In the past if I had extra time before hand I would have a yard sale not this time. Extra clothes will go to the Goodwill. Freecycle and Craigslist will also be used.

Frozen Goodness

While at the farm market Wednesday purchasing my usual second baskets. I was told I could get a bushel of freezer corn for $10. What, are you serious? last year I paid $22. I was all over it. The corn was larger then I usually prefer for corn on the cob but perfect for freezing. I got 27 quart bags from the bushel, plus 2 meals of COC.

Also the second baskets are awesome. This market puts a mixture of veggies in 4 qt and 8 qt baskets. Sometimes they aren't pretty. In other words they are marked, small, misshapen, larger then normal, mutated (2 summer squah stuck together) singles, or yesterday's. I stop once or twice a week and get a fruit basket for fruit and yogurt and a veggie basket. I also buy new veggies, but mostly the seconds keep up fed most of the summer.

Why I don't comment and don't care if anyone comments here.

I haven't been blogging for long. Most of the time I am trying to create a place to put down ideas. I have middle of the road ideas about most things: religion, politics, childrearing and relationships. I don't think I am offensive in the least.

However I have found that the majority of the time my comments on other moderated comments are deleted. I just had it happen again. I mean it makes me want to check to see if my deoderant is failing me. You know?

I am not every time, just more then I thought was usual. A week or so ago I commented that I agreed with a blogger about a recipe that was posted. I mean those are pretty much the words I used, "I tried this recipe and it was great." What about that could have turned someone off. The lastest one was a comment about the kind and color of paint. I think I said something along the lines of I tried a similar color in a different brand.

I also stopped joining swaps and giveaways.

Sorry for the rant. Leave a comment. Maybe you will see it on here, maybe not.

How to stay cool in 95 degree heat without A/C

It is 95 today, yesterday and all week long. How to stay cool?

1. Fans are your friend. For some reason air that is hot and moving doesn't feel as bad as plain hot air.

2. Drink lots of water.

3. Go swimming it cools your body.

4. Visit air conditioned public places: libraries, stores, mall, etc.

5. Eat cold foods: popcicles, ice cream, etc.

6. Take a shower.

7. Regulate the heat in your home. Open windows on the cooler side, close the ones on the warmer side. Cause a draft using two fans in opposite windows first blowing one way and then the other.

8. Relax. There is no better time to just get as much done as fast as possible and then just sit back and relax, with a book or movie or whatever.



8.

Things I think about

After living in 3 of my own homes and 6 or 7 of my mother I have decided that the out in the middle of the hallway linen closet doesn't work. The ones in the bathroom also make little to no sense. I want to try one in the laundry room.

I prefer electric ranges over gas, but gas ovens over electric. I don't like the seperate range and oven though. No idea how to solve this one.

I want a home with a summer kitchen. My brother bought a house like this the second kitchen is downstairs. Its an old farm house. I love it but I don't think they use it.

I want a pergola in my dream back yard with a crap load of flowers. Peonies, tulips, daffadils, marigolds, sunflowers, roses, asters, daisies, etc. I want a willow tree too, but they can be hard to manage. Fruit trees maybe.

I want 3 bathrooms in my home: girls, boys, and guest.

I want a house with character but not falling down. I want a porch not a deck. I have a house with a deck. I want wind chimes. A lot of them.

I want a pantry and an office, a laundry shoot.

I just really want to move.

A broken mower, a gym membership and a trip out of town

What do these all have in common? Well they are all a drain on my budget. Which I haven't consulted in the last 5 days. It was becoming a crutch so I tossed it. It felt good. BUT now the dred comes back.

First the mower will have to be fixed or a suitable alternative will have to be arranged. I think I will look for a push mower as soon as I get home. I have gone through 2 in 3 years. I will pay around 50 for it.

Then the gym membership will have to go in the last 4 months he has not gone to it anyway. First there was enough time, then he didn't feel like it, and now says it is because he doesn't have the "right" clothes. I am officially done.

Finally I will have to live with my decision from this trip for the next 2 months fortunately part of the spending is for school clothes so that isn't so bad.

Ever wonder how we get to a place in time?

What a frugal family does on vacation

1. Drive to a location within 8 hours of their home.

2. Stays with friends or relatives or camps out.

3. Visit free admission attractions,( ie local parks, museums, neighborhood pools.)

4. Brings food for the drive there and anytime we eat away from the place we are staying.

5. Takes a lot of digital pictures.

6. Has a budget.

7. Saves for the journey.

8. Enjoys each others company.

9. Checks out local attractions and has a plan.

10. Goes only once a year.

How our summer shirts become rugs.

Does your family have a summer uniform. An outfit totally thrifty that they wear everyday during the summer. Maybe they wouldn't get caught dead in it during the rest of the year?

Hubby: jeans and black or dark blue t-shirts (He wears his all of the time.)



Me: Capris/shorts or white t-shirt



Girl: cut off shorts and t shirts



Boy: cut off shorts and t shirts



Hubby and I get shirts from discount stores. The kids get shirts from TS and discount stores. We try to keep the cost of shirts down to under a $1 each. If they become stained, they become nightwear or they get dyed. I just bought an orange dye at the discount grocery store for .99. I get black there on a regular basis.

I figure at $.99 a box the average box of dye resurrects about 5 shirts. The hubby wears his shirts forever because black doesn't stain and any fading gets dyed black again.



After that they are rags or rugs. I have a rag rug in my bathroom. I cut t shirts into strips and crochet with a rug hook. The rest of the t shirt is used to clean. I use these for anything I used to use paper towels for: washing the car, cleaning the sink, cleaning the bath, wiping up messes.

The Food Pantry

First of all, I can not get food stamps. I receive rent from my house (that I can't live in) and that means that my unearned income is more than the maxium. While our wages were well under limits. found this out when hubs got cellulitis and almost lost his leg.

So take a moment and imagine that. I work a part time job, he is let go from his job, no medical insurance, very little money and my mom saying we can always move back with her. He ends up in the hospital and almost loses his leg. He can't get unemployment and the job he was working at couldn't be saved that long for him. Do you have heart palpitations yet?



Ok back to reality. The young woman who said "Sorry we can't give you benefits at this time." also gave me a handful of brochures and in them was information about Angelfood ministries and the various food pantries available in my area. At the time I just used the information for Angelfood, being the proud idiot that I am, and with the garden producing and family tossing in meat. We got through the next 6 months.



You see I was embarrassed to admit that I needed the food pantry, plus only poor people do that right? In December of 2007 it got really bad, we had nothing and couldn't get help. Plus after 4 months of unemployed hubby, we were just trying to get ahead. We had a broken down Van and instead of fixing it we bought a falling apart car because it was cheaper. One night right before Christmas we went grocery shopping with our $25. We had nothing and it was getting worse. We came home to find a basket of gifts and a Christmas card with a $100 gift card in it. At this point we knew we were going to fail if we didn't get more help. The next week we went to the food pantry.

In the last 2 1/2 years we have gone on and off. We go if we need the help and don't if we don't. Each time we go we get 3 vegetables, 3 fruit, 4 meat, 2 bread, 2 cereal, crackers, 2 soup. It won't make me rich and we always use it.



They also give things as a special. Candy at Easter and Christmas. Ham or Turkey for Christmas or Thanksgiving. Produce in the summer. In the fall we can get gloves and hats for winter.



What I found out is that every one at the food pantry has the same story I do. The majority work, some are disabled and don't get benefits. It makes it easier.

Last month we received pasta, spagetti sauce, 2 cans of tuna, noodles, chicken noodle soup, corn, green bean, chick peas, peanut butter, hamburger helper, 2 boxs of cereal, 2 loaves of bread, tomato soup, cheese crackers, juice, eggs, 3 lbs hamburger, cookies, and dry and shelf stable milk. All in all it probably would have cost around $50.

Yes I shop at the Scratch and Dent Store

About once a month I shop at a discount grocery store. At this store you will find the following: fresh deli meats and cheeses, canned vegetables with a "older" label, test products, and products from stores that have closed. These products have been marked down at a significant level.

"Have you ever seen/purchased a product that was expired?" Yes, I have seen and yes I have purchased some products that were within a month of the expiration date. I am perfectly fine and so are my family members and pets.

" Are you afraid something will be damaged and you will lose money?" No, I have the opportunity to look at the product in the store. In the 10 year I have been shopping there I have only throw away one canned item that appeared to be leaking. At the time I was sure if it was really leaking or if the liquid on the outside of the can was from a broken bottle of dressing. So either way I think I won out.

"Does this really save you a lot?" Yes, I look at it in the whole. Each time I go I pay $50 for $80 worth of food. I do take a "list" of things I am out of and looking for. There can be a big savings. I like rice wine vinegar. At a typical store it is $2-3, at the Scratch and Dent it is .50. And no it is not expired.

Really the majority of the products are actually not expired. They are an older version of the packaging, a special item (like peanut butter and banana creme Reese cups), Easter candy in June.

This is just a strategy for filling in the gaps of the food pantry, Aldi and Sav A lot shopping lists.

A

Birkenstock: Why I wear the ugliest shoes

For the last 8 years I have worn Birkenstocks. I admit it they are kind of ugly but I could not live without them.

First as a 12 year old girl I broke my ankle and it healed weird. Because of that I have one flat and one "normal" foot. As a teen I wore an insert in my shoe. It wasn't very comfortable. I lost it severla times and needed to replace it 4-5 times. each time we replaced it we paid $200.

At some point it became my responsibility to buy it and I didn't want to, so I didn't. Fast forward 7 years and I start having back pain and cramping in my left foot. Guess what? It was my flat foot screaming out in pain. The doctor told me I had to stop wearing heels and go back to the insert or wear a brace.

As I was deep in an emotional abyss without my beautiful shoes, a cowork atarted wearing these funny looking shoes. You see she had a meesed up disk in her back and her doctor suggested Birkenstocks. They weren't cute but within about 3 months she stopped walking like a hunchback.

So I thought what then heck. I am happy to say that I walk perfectly upright and pain isn't an issue anymore. I have 4 pairs of birks and have only retired one pair. I have purchased them for as little as 3.99 (New at a Thrift Store) - 68 (new on eBay.) Only one pair (the retired pair) didn't work for me. They caused a blister on the arch of my "normal" foot.

So all in all I feel like I am ahead. I don't use as much pain medication and no inserts.

The strangeness of strangers.

They aren't really strangers. They are neighbors that are strangers. Yeah we know who they are. Hubs even graduated from high schol with the wife (and is a facebook friend.) I haven't spoken to them at all during the 3 years we have lived here. The one time he spoke to the neighbor wife, we were trying to figure out where the neighbor son hid my son's glasses. He is a bully. So I told both kids to avoid him.



Meanwhile back at the ranch. Neighbor hubby mows their lawn at least once if not twice a week. They kennel 2 dogs in the same kennel at the same time, while they monitor my dogs water and call the humane society. They have a garden I am jealous of. I mean mouthwatering. Their yard is to die for and of course they do not live in a hovel.

Why I haven't purchased a pair of jeans in 5 years.

First of all I have to tell you about my sister. She is the type of consumer that likes what she likes. She likes a specific product in a color and size she can wear. She only buys jeans at one store and has worn the same size for 3 years. Luckily when she lost weight I didn't for six months after. She also likes them in a medium color. Black is bad. Light color is equally bad. However every once in a while she buys both wear them once and gives them immediately to me.

Now that being said (or written,) she also likes them to feel a certain way. Not stiff, not loose. When they don't feel right or if heaven forbid she tries a different color, style or size. I get them.

Now I used to actually go to the store and get them. They are $40 pairs of jeans. I bought on sale or put them on my store card (when I had one) and got points to buy more clothes. Problem was I never really needed all those clothes (more on that later.) So when she started giving these to me I saw it as devine intervention and accepted. Last time I looked she had given me 14 pairs in 5 years.



The first thing I do is check the inseam for wear and zig zag stitch to reinforce them. As time passes and I get a split I patch it quickly. I also employ the 3 Theory introduced by Amy Dacyczyn in The Tightwad Gazette. The oldest (2) pair gets used for yard work. The middle gets used on a daily basis, and the unpatched gets used to go out.



I also have used 4 pairs as a basis of a quilt for my son. I gave 2 pair to my cousin who is our size. I have 4 pair I wear and 3 pair are in a box to use in the future. 2 pair are long gone I made a few hot pads and I think a draft dog with them. I also expect her to give me more in the fall.



All of this for excepting a gift of recycled clothes.



A

There isn't going to be a FAIL here.

I really don't like my in-laws. No that isn't right, I'm just not that close to them. Wow, where did that come from.

I have been married to their son/brother for a few months short of 14 years. Ten of those years I lived 250 miles away and we saw them well about 5-6 times a year. I gave birth to their first grandchildren. We supported ourselves (for the most part) and bought a house. We made friends and developed a self. You know what a self is. Lets say you have 2 friends Dave and his wife Jen and after a while they become DaveandJen. That's a self.

Well this whole time I felt like they were just waiting for us to fail. WAIT. What I should say is that they were waiting for him to fail. And for a while it really looked like he was. I mean he has a weight issue. Or a food issue. He also didn't what to work in the high paying shop job anymore, so we had to reduce, reduce, and when we got on our feet reduce again. Now we are reducing a fourth time to move out of the hovel. And this whole time it feels like they are just waiting for the final FAIL.

Well good luck to them because it 'ain't' going to happen. I don't know how to fail and guess what neither does my husband. Your son might have, but my husband doesn't.

Mental break down

Everyone has some kind of mental issues. They call them phobias, fears, depression, anxiety, or just plain craziness. Everyone also chooses to avoid admitting them. They fear how others will see them. Then they want others to not see their issues.

Where do these things come from? Well some will say they got it from their parents. It is inherited. It is learned. Others will blame life events, births and death. Some say you are born this ways, others say you were damaged at some point.

So my issues are simple...

Well I tell you what I will tell you mine, if you tell me yours.

A

Clothing

There are several aspects to clothing. How to get it. How to clean it. How to keep it good.



How to get it. First there are some cloths I just won't wear used: swimwear, underwear, socks and everyday shoes. Hubs is a hard to find size so the majority of his clothes are purchased new. For these we shop sales and use gift money.

My kids get one new outfit to start school. New shirt, pants, shoes, underwear. I buy underwear and jeans and put them on lay a away. Then I search yard sales, thrift store for the rest. Every once in a while we score hand me downs. If there are any holes in our wardrobe I fill them with articles gotten on sale.

Laundry is a very serious matter. I use the following products: liquid laundry detergent (Tide in summer, Xtra during the rest of the year) bleach for whites, dry bleach for colors, and fabric softener. Stains are constant battle. Fortunately with so many recycled belonging, if the stain does come out it isn't a complete disaster.

Keep it good. Play cloths are for play and school clothes are for school. I have my kids change when they get home. This does increase laundry, but the good cloths last longer. I follow the same rule.

A

Shelter

First remember the goal was to not lose our house. We were willing to do anything we had to accomplish this. Yes even move in with my mother, thinking in would take a month or so to get on our feet. What was supposed to be a 3 month stay, turned into a 10 month adventure.



Before doing this yourself you have to realise one thing no matter what. I was family, my kids were family, but my husband was not. In the ten months we lived there he definitely bore the brunt of the negative. All of the idiosyncrasies will come out. Eating habits, hygiene, humor, laundry, cleaning habits everything can cause dissension. Can and will cause dissension.



After a motivating argument with my sister, I left my mother's house for a less then satisfactory replacement. We moved to a month by month rental, it is a single wide trailer with half a replaced roof and half a roof that needs replaced. Part of the floor is weak. The doors are warped. We moved because we didn't think we would be here this long. It was 3 years this month.



In the first year we were here my husband developed a medical condition that caused him to be off work for 4 months with no pay and no unemployment. I had started school 2 weeks before this. I continued.



In the second year I got a full time job and worked a second job. Hubby went to school and worked. We were never here. So we stayed because it gave us a place to live and it is annoying but not dangerous.



In year 3 it is time to move, we just need a place in this area that we can afford.



Wish us luck!

Jobs lead to shelter, food and security

Upon deciding to leave our home and life style, we moved in with my mom. As I mentioned earlier we had a plan, we just didn't follow it. Instead we settled in, put kids in school, and took a look at our finances; deciding we were in big trouble. We were never going to recover. Depression settled in.

Don't let this happen to you. If you allow it to you will fail. Instead get up and just do it. If it is wrong, so what.

At this time hubby was working a job he hated, but he was working. I was on unemployment and should have gotten ut there and gotten a job. I "tried" but the lure of staying home was too great. Plus we took a paper route and I did the route most of the time. It became easy to not have (another) job.

So then the pressure became too great and I got a series of jobs that really sucked. Clerk in convenience store, receptionist in a family owned screen printing business, and finally telemarketer. All of these paid a decent wage but nothing great, all of them I walked away from with a clear desire to never do that job again. One of them I was let go from because I didn't niche with the employees. What? That was a crushing blow.

Working is an important task. It keeps you out there. Bad jobs keep you motivated to get a better job.

Solution: Hubs stayed at crappy job until he found less crappy job and finally job he likes. I took a position with a bank until it sucked and moved on to a job a can stand until a better one comes along.

Basic Survival

In addition to managing our budget, I manage the elements of basic survivial: food, clothing and shelter.

On the food angle, I buy at limited supply stores (Aldi, Sav A Lot), discount grocery, and some lose leader items. I also garden, can, and go to the food pantry. A lot of friends tell me they can see going to the food pantry FP. I guess they haven't been that desperate before. I on the other hand have. When I go I get ( 2 boxes of cereal, 2 cans of soup, crackers, 2 pasta products, 2 fruit, 2 cans of tuna, misc household items, frozen meat and bread) and sometimes we get extras like eggs, bacon, TP. I have always found a way to use everything. I don't turn anything down. Yes I have seen others do this. I find it gooch. I am not to proud to go. In fact the majority of the people I see there are just like me, working 2-3 jobs and still need help. We could get Food Stamps if we tried.

And the same people drive over to the discount grocery with me every month. There we are able to suppliment our FP food. We find mayo, ketchup. salad dressing, canned veggies, etc in good condition still in date, sometimes in an outdated container. My favorite finds are promo items. These are containers that are being moved because the contest priced on the side is over. This is the only way my kids get regular cereal and Poptarts.

Finally, Sav A Lot is my stre of choice. I take 40 dollars in there every week and hope I have enough for dog food, and everything on my list not gotten from the discount store or FP. It has a slightly better selection then Aldi. It is also closer to my house. And it helps me cut from my budget if I have a need.

Groceries are an area where I can always find room to save.

The Plan

You need a plan. Ok go ahead and take a week to mourn the loss of your job or celebrate it. Whatever. But then you need a plan.

First sit down and write out what your goals for the next 12 months are. Our list looked like this: get a more interesting job, keep kids home, survive. We then laughed about the more interesting job but my husabnd was serious. He didn't want to work in a shop anymore. So we talked about what he could do and then what he wanted to try which led him back to school. He wanted something close to electronics, which was the field he had just left. He decided on IT. Started classes but soon determined that it wasn't the change he needed. So he changed to heating and air conditioning.

One good thing was that he put himself out there and he wasn't afraid to try and fail. Since he was at his other job 8 years he knew a change would bring him to another job for the same amount of time.

The second part of the plan was not putting kids into child care. I thought that meant staying home. I know we could have done this another way. We should have done this another way. I should have gotten a job. I didn't instead I reduced expenses. I cut everything back. If it required money I cut it back. Groceries, clothing, bills all got the same treatment. In the end it wasn't enough so if I had it to do over I would get a job.


Lastly is survival...

What should I do?

The mistake some people make when they go on unemployment is that they see it as a paid vacation. It isn't. First you need a plan. Are you going back to school? Will you be going back to work in the next 6 months? Should you look for a different job? What would be an acceptable job? Do you have an emergency fund? Should you take a part time job until things get better?

Fortunately this time around our family has avoided the unemployment trap, but that wasn't the story 6 years ago. I was a SAHM. My husband made a very comfortable living, then suddenly it was gone. No chance of going back. It has a very confusing and scary time.

At first we looked at it as a chance to do some things around the house. Of course we didn't have the money, but we had credit. My husband went on interviews but turned down several jobs that would have been fine. Less money but still fine. We also convinced ourselves that that new "perfect" job was just around the corner.

About 4 months in we sat down and decided we needed a plan. We didn't however come up with one at that time. So this phase was the plan to have a plan. A lot of questions were asked but no answers came. We were afraid to voice our real feelings and thoughts.
.
At 6 months in our seasonal jobs were due to end. We finally got a plan. He would go back to school. I would continue to work part time. We started attending church together. e were hoping for the best.

I forgot to mention that in the middle of month 3 he decided to get a part time job. It was easy to do and paid fairly well. It improved him morale. It also got him out of the house. By the time it ended, he was ready to move on.

Now you might think this is the beginning of the rest of our lives. Well it was really the beginning of the beginning....

Life is Strange

Right now I am trying to get rid of a house. Yes a house. My first house to be exact. The house that 13 years ago I dreamed of, saved for and was excited to find the same house was also part of the disaster that became life. You see I am part of a statistic. I am a homeowner who can't afford to live in my house.

First of all it is now 250 miles away from where I do live. It costs twice as much to live there, and after my husband lost one job to the internet crisis, other to NAFTA and a third to an economic down turn, we could no longer live there. So I liquidated an IRA and gave away 1/2 a household of stuff and moved in with my mother. Well I did and so did my husband and 2 kids with my mother, sister, and 23 year old. Meanwhile we tried to sell the house...

Of course it didn't sell right away so I panic and get a rental manager. Who screws us over 700 times before we finally lose the renter and find someone who actually WANTS the house. They couldn't get financing without a deposit and bla blaa blaa.

So here I am just trying not to be hopeful because that gets me in trouble.

Berti